Image by Meriç Dağlı

Enneagram + Birth | Type 4

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4: THE INDIVIDUALIST

“Fours are self-aware, sensitive, and reserved. They are emotionally honest, creative, and personal, but can also be moody and self-conscious. Withholding themselves from others due to feeling vulnerable and defective, they can also feel disdainful and exempt from ordinary ways of living. They typically have problems with melancholy, self-indulgence, and self-pity. At their Best: inspired and highly creative, they are able to renew themselves and transform their experiences.”

INSIGHTS:

  • Fours tend to focus on the emotions of their experiences. They are typically looking for a joyful birth experience.

  • Fours may be very affected by how they were made to feel during their labors. Even if everything went well “on paper,” if they were made to feel disrespected or unheard, they will view their experience as a bad one.

  • Fours can be very affected by their environment, as well, especially while in labor.

HOMEWORK:

  • Talk to your birth team about your wishes for your birth. Make it clear to them how you prefer to be spoken to and what may trigger negative feelings for you. Many fours find that they are very sensitive to how they were spoken to during labor and birth.

  • Try to figure out what makes you feel safest and make sure that is part of your birth plan. Think about your environment, the people that are around you, the way you’d like your care provider to communicate changes that need to be made – the details make all the difference.

  • Don’t be afraid to communicate your birth “dreams” with your team. Even if they aren’t the “romantic” types, what’s important to you should be important to them. They also may be able to talk you through something that is unrealistic.